I taught myself a lesson tonight on accident. Gotta love it when that happens. And there were no casualties in this lesson learned - even better!
I've been pining over a guy for a while.... June will be a year. I messed it up early in the "relationship" and have been paying for it, emotionally, ever since. Tonight - I'm hoping I put an end to it. I'm at the "shit or get off the pot" stage right now. I'm 33, I know what I want, I know I'm an amazing partner. No doubt a catch in most areas.
I'm not desperate, but I *AM* done pining over someone if he has no romantic interest in me. I refuse to feel sluggish or down or mopey anymore because of a guy who may or may not want me... a guy who may or may not like to dangle a carrot.
It was one of those nights tonight. After my very nice dinner with NayNay and most excellent conversation - I got a text from my mystery caller.... and I ended up laying it all on the table. I'm sticking to my guns - although I realize that this may be "it."
So, while feeling all droopy and lethargic... I began to count my blessings. And I began to act on those blessings by letting people know what they mean to me. Not drippy sweet or anything. But by letting people know you love them, you experience love... and in that, I realized that I am loved. While I may not be loved by the man of my choosing right now - I am loved. And that's alright by me.
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